made a few pictures to let everyone smile
Downloads: 39
2009-10-27 13:34
; ;
; ;
; ;
; ;
< / p>
; ;
; ;
; ;
; ;
; ;
; ;
; ;
< / p>
; ;
; ;
; ;
; ;
cattle were stopped by a traffic police: .
Soon, another person said the traffic police to stop cattle, cattle were off, the traffic police, said: is the oil? Japanese are human beings?
1, a hungry wolf feeding, training children to hear a woman: cry put throw you out to feed the wolf! Children crying night, the wolf at the door so journeying to dawn, sighed: liar, a woman is a liar!
2. a prisoner to be executed, because the bullet is bad, and the first shot did not release, then they put a second gun ... the gun ... then the third prisoner cried: Brother you strangle me it, too damn scary!
3. a black one hundred meters after the game watching the old lady, wiping away tears, said: It's incredible! Several coal mining kneeling in a row to be shot, did not aim to open the gun, wanderers are running scared that ah, rope stopping wow!
4, Wong loves the revolution, to commemorate the Red Army, to his son named 'army', the day school to send his son, see 8 bus stop, then rushed his son shouted: Yellow Army Run, eight come! ~ ~ ~
5, a bear go to the mountains start, the farmer gave him a sickle, a carpenter gave him a hammer, bear to the mountains encountered the tiger, scared the sickle, a hammer held in the head, the tiger said: did not see it on you like this bear was a party to!
6, the farmer knows the weight of excrement, foreigners see and asked: Grandpa, how much a pound this sauce? Farmer, without a word burberry suits, foreigners hand dip the point into his mouth, thinking: you do not tell me how much a pound, I do not have to tell you you smell the sauce.
7. One day Xiao Ming plaster hands,
teacher asked: Do you hand how the
Little said: cut off
teacher said: Why?
Little said: because I am too lazy
teacher said: too lazy to hand it will break?
Little said: I go on the road, ran into a stone shoes,
but I get lazy hand,
shaking poles on foot to hold the stone falls out,
passers-by to see a shock to think that I hit my hand with a wooden
so .................
teacher :............
8. B, C three trips together, a cold ... ...
night, we sleep with a bed, a sleep center.
middle of the night ... A play a big sneezing,
A B C is the crystallization of the entire face.
B C: Next to notify us of ... ...
After a half hour,
A: Note the ...
EPR heard in quickly drill into quilts,
and determine there is no connectivity with the outside world ...
result, a put the ass.
9.
once and several students to go home to see his high school teacher,
it was an old man, and before leaving,
left us some fruit to give teachers,
tight, but the teacher squad leader pulled tight laptop bag, said:
friends,
approaching when,
friends not far from pointing to a ugly girl on the driver said:
to, where to stop? ,
I think the company and they need to bring people to meet.
manager received immediately after the instructions under the buy machine,
intended to travel, is finishing his luggage.
Pro starting the day, was Secretary of the block down.
secretary: ? Wal-Mart
9 pound bass,
if the dead to put ice on seven two,
as fresh. Work of a brother,
to quickly go to buy, or have often been bought,
a brother to stand before tanks and other ah,
sometimes quite a while to not die one.
a brother to go fishing with a net, the fish's head with the handle knocked.
attendants really could not stand up,
come with the brother said:
day visit to the male dormitory,
just a boy wearing nothing in the ground scurrying ~
be seen
any classes immediately jumping on the bed, shouting,
quilt cover ~
left a word of any classes left:
so I have not seen what a great age,
you ask the students what ~
giant cold - -!!!
14 One day, A king shit in the toilet inside,
estimates could not pull out,
in the toilet inside the bark.
At this point, outside the B king heard,
so loudly sing:
immediately and then sing:
br> graduate student in a campus named Willow.
in the undergraduate campus,
North Division is a small place Simon bicycle parking,
prepared specifically for graduate students,
on the wall read, .
once and a friend from that too,
see he paused,
final struggle for a long time and finally asked me puzzled:
you say Willow Who are the students , real cattle X, so many bikes! 1.
he shouted.
No. 1 in our class to stand up,
shouting sound: to! that the teacher said:
Please in English! (Please answer in English)
I That student scratched his head,
hold for a long time answered the sentence:
guide ~ ~ ~ (made second sound)
17. one was admitted to Beijing University students and alumni of a dialogue:
you Yunnan?
it?
and Yunnan no entrance examinations are archery competitions,
put a sign a kilometer away,
write one shot Tsinghua University, Peking University the second shot, failed, and finally to the insurance,
shot of a recent brand, is the school.
18.
our dormitory to-night or night out and the wife is field of play,
late back,
call us to open the door paul smith watch,
then we let them on the slogan,
King of the earth, tiger,
pagoda town river demon,
What What Ha Ha,
yellow face, how?
eat shit they do not eat the yellow is definitely not open the door.
have a winter evening the fish,
wind and getting bigger,
a man cold to die,
back to knock on the door,
not on the signal, and
directly in that call,
eat shit eat my face is yellow,
quickly open the door.
sound of loud, we live in a building, 3rd floor are heard. . . .
19. there is one, is listening to what others say.
words, when the end of the poorest,
a bedroom people have no money,
not dare to ask the family to the collective diet.
in order to save the physical, we all skipped school a.
noon counselor to the bedroom,
see one has a weakly lying in bed,
was very surprised.
not open, hears the bedroom leisurely boss said The University has a female student,
Beijing,
cold kind of humor.
her about her entrance check points after things.
call to check the sub-station check points.
found when the math scores,
phone report:
Hey, mathematics kept to 60 minutes I had?
21. freshman, Shijiazhuang,
winter, cold day,
just eat the morning class time,
all the way to go toward the cafeteria crowd,
our class a few one went to the library before,
mouth large pond here, end up with a thin layer of ice,
several of our southern ice on the discussion
This person can not afford a weight,
time from their own experiences in Shaanxi boss jumped on the ice,
said: No problem, see also leave it,
can not only walk but also enjoyed it.
Yan Bi,
saw boss in slow motion, slowly sinking into the ice surface from the bottom,
hand waving to us also to maintain the posture,
school most of the students were stunned to this wonderful moment.
boss reaction hsiang,
some thump to the shore,
then got up and ran lightning,
so we returned to the bedroom I saw was in the bed of their own said:
Needless to say, and after whom mention, I destroy who.
22. a shopping suddenly felt stomach pain
into the corner so you can eat 199 hot pot restaurants
would like to take a toilet use
happens searched to find the first floor is not So I went to
the second floor to the second floor is also decorated the empty nothing
but found a toilet close to the He could not help myself
tube thirty-seven twenty-first, anyway, no one around
Tuoliaokuzi squatted on the toilet toward
wolf in sheep ... ... thrilled! !
after
I went downstairs only to find empty
strange time when dinner is also filled with visitors
downstairs just how suddenly empty it? Even the waiters and reception are gone ... ...
So I approached the bar,
and asked: Some people in? How did people?
At this point, I saw a male waiter from the bar to drill out the audience,
and speak:
Fuck! ... ... Just fall from the ceiling
stool hit the fan when you do not it? Count your lucky ......
23. High school talk about permutations and combinations, grouping do problems.
Lei teacher cried out:
you can not stand in the first row and last row,
there are many kinds of permutation? Pai Mei ... can not ... ...
teacher anger, punishment Lei station.
and cried out wave:
wave of fear,
long while,
A: : I'm sorry three.
B: What are you sorry for?
A: I'm sorry five.
25 .-- Yesterday on the bus when,
bus driver has been staring at me,
as I did not buy a ticket like.
- how do you do?
- very simple,
I have been staring at him,
as I bought a ticket like
26. summer of a particular class,
I lie on the eyes closed on the desk confused,
confused feeling someone's arm in my fingers encountered a,
I thought it was at the same table,
to pull him over with nails,
found no response,
I increased the power to pull him over,
still did not move, depressed,
same table that does not meet my style Yeah,
do pull lighter?
so I toss meal Meng,
is caught, is twisted,
toss for a while, they feel the wrong,
slightly opened his eyes, yeah,
that is the position of a teacher sitting at my table,
is looking at me weird,
hand piece of skin that are red
27. One afternoon, my students are bored in the Construction Bank to work, a woman wearing a very bad (neurotic) came to his window and gave him a note to withdrawal.
note written on
inscribed *** *** CP Central Office.
I had wanted to alert the students can see the neurotic woman very serious look, think, or sent to fight the security count birds. (~ estimated security is also very busy).
Sure enough, the security of the woman, said: You want to withdraw this note, you must first opposite the police station, find a chapter director of cover, he covers finished chapter, you get money again no problem friends. went the police station. (This really is not security in general, usually somewhat underestimate him).
About ten minutes, the queue of customers gradually increased recently when the girl came back elated, holding that note, said: that matter, office procedures simplified, without approval of the director can withdraw money directly to friends. gave sent back.
my classmate and security were a bit silly, a lot of business people in the hall, afraid she was psychotic episode up and affect the normal order, and had to shift supervisor hired.
female patients in the side of the head and talk with, and asked what to do with you withdraw money ah, female patient said: place, the woman would then happily go.
Security to consult to the Agricultural Bank of China, to buy something to wear, etc., get money to go to ICBC the job! > ... ... ... ...
After a child, the woman is back. and bring the bank's answer: people say, we are here is a public line, only to take the public's, mother said I was not !!!!, slut, to build the line to get money knowledge of the topic.
a brother said he had time to sit soft sleeper train,
results come after a while the conductor told him to change cars,
he asked the conductor how is it,
conductor told him that this section Government officials have been up car,
this coach, we all pack up
angry, cursed the government corruption
a brother stunned:
are left off the train,
not only mistresses,
package also fuck train! ,
there are times people eat with a vote of authentic Peking Duck.
br> Nanjing duck, for one!
, and Duan Leyi plate and serve.
br> kneeling in front of the old man said:
turtle injury. so snail to buy medicine. Over 2 hours. Snail not come back. Turtle anxious curse: fuck do not come back I died herve leger outlet! When the door came a snail's voice: I do not say you are his mother had
31. Language tests,
have a fill-in.
requests were filled,
a raw knew nothing.
fill the first empty,
he quietly asked the same table,
A Day: .
32. an English exam,
A king is a loss,
find that Jun B has been filled very full,
busy throwing paper in the past for help.
Soon, B Jun throw to a ball of paper.
A king overjoyed, busy open.
I saw a piece of rubber wrapped in paper inside,
rubber sides painted A, B, C, D four letters,
there are words on paper: your throw.
33. a high-ranking officials to visit a farm,
asked the farmer:
how do I find there is a cattle farm
no Longhorn ah.
farmer replied:
cattle without horns, for many reasons,
may be genetic,
not born,
is also possible that later fell off sick,
but it does not angle because it is a horse but
34. a child to eat noodles,
eating eating,
I pulled one from the throat:
of noodles! The wife's mother came to visit,
wife's mother: You just sit Oh! food will be OK!
and then into the kitchen busy,
then the living room only tight wife's mother Xiao-Ming Yang and
dog white
Suddenly, Xiao Ming found himself in the stomach pain up,
he thought: No! I have to hold back!
but he could not bear it ~ ~
Poof ~ ~
he put a ring invincible smelly fart,
he thought to himself: This is a ~ ~ under the dead will be cast out of the wife's mother just did not think
shouted out: white ~ ~!
Xiaoming so reassuring thought: Fortunately, there are white when my scapegoat,
then he could not help but put the first 2 ass,
wife's mother is still shouting white ~ ~
When he put the ass when the third,
rushed out to see the wife's mother cursed, said:
white! you will have to wait until the run is not to be Xiusi
; ;
No comments:
Post a Comment